December got away from me. In the midst of entering unemployment again, hiring a lawyer to deal with final paperwork from my former employer (the summary statement is nothing was signed and my boss was warned to immediately cease all contact) and having job hunting come to a standstill due to the pending holidays, I found myself becoming more of an observant of life instead of a participant.
A mindset that continued through Christmas with visiting in-laws and potentially tense family dynamics.
A mindset that I was completely over by December 27, when I woke to greet my 40th birthday.
Knowing that the day had the complete potential to be horribly bad, I hatched a plan to drive to the beach in search of tafoni, with an alternative agenda of communing with the ocean and finding a way to recharge my soul. By early morning, I found myself with a companion, with Maddy wanting to join me while Teddy spent the day with Grey to finish building some LEGOs. And though I didn't expect much, I was secretly hoping for some sign of inspiration to carry with me for the road ahead.
The day was a beautiful one and Maddy and I quickly found the tafoni I was hoping to see.
The Pacific also didn't disappoint, with optimal conditions attracting kite surfers who all actively recruiting Maddy to join them on the waves.
But it wasn't until reviewing the photos from the day later that evening that I found the sign I had been hoping for: my Sea Witch.
Today was spent hiking with Grey and the kids, finding some great outlooks of the Bay and a great place to fly kites. It as also spent sparing with the parents, who are angry with me over setting boundaries and refusing to fall back into old patterns. The day ended with finding a dead crow on our front lawn; a sign of the death of the old and the birth of something new.
But it's still the imagine craved in the rocks that comes back to me as if a waking dream; almost as if a promise of something beautiful and amazing on the horizon ahead, marking the birthday and new year as a transitional one.