When the waiting gets hard

It's been over a week since Grey's interview. Over a week of waiting. An all too familiar type of wait. The told Grey they would get back to him about this position this week. Today is Thursday and we still haven't heard a word. All on the heels of job offers here for me, which would delay a transition.

It goes without saying that anxiety is high and we're both a bit depressed. Despite follow-ups to Grey's thank you emails that all sounded promising, we're preparing ourselves for bad news. Scheduling time needed to continue the job hunting process while grieving the loss of something that seemed so promising.

All of this reminds me of those previous two week waits, where so much was riding on the end. Where hope initially was high only to fizzle out at the end. I remember all too well those similar feelings of defeat and rejection all before the betas. How hard it was not to cry over such a great loss.

So I've been pulling out my toolbox of tricks to get through this period. Distraction being one. Reminding Grey that I believe in him even when it seems like the world doesn't.

And of course, music to calm the voices of doubt and fear.

Tomorrow is Friday. Maybe we'll get lucky.