Holding hands, she balanced herself as she walked along the buttress roots of a large bay fig tree. Never having seen one myself, I walked beside her, enjoying the bending and weaving of this beautiful tree and laughing at the game she was creating.
From the outside looking in, we looked like the typical mother-daughter pair enjoying a visit to the Arboretum. Stopping to admire the fountain, explore the sundial, letting her smell all the flowers and spending a good 20 mins in the rose garden where she declared they were her favorite part.
But what the observer would miss is the ache in this mother's heart. That though she is so grateful to have this quiet moment with her child, there would also be a wave of sadness for those that weren't there.
Yesterday was International Bereaved Mother's Day. And though the waves of grief no longer are drowning me, there are still moments where the sadness returns. Thinking of the six we lost, thinking of the babies those in this community have said good-bye too all too soon and thinking about Moon's friends who are thick in their grief.
So we found ourselves at this garden when the sadness hit me. Allowing it to meld with the beauty surrounding us, creating a memory that I will forever treasure. Because though from the outside we look like a normal mother-daughter pair, our story is more than that.
(Click the hyperlinks for more information about CarlyMarie Project Heal and The Mother Hearts Project)
Lovely post, Cristy. I think we forget, too often, that so often what appears to be a normal (whatever that is) mother-daughter pair is more than that. Thanks for reminding us. Sending love.
ReplyDeleteWhat a curious juxtaposition: beauty and connect as well as a deep sense of sadness and loss. You capture the complexity so exquisitely.
ReplyDeleteWishing you grace for present and past.
ReplyDeleteOh, beautiful. How many stories are layered beneath what we see on the outside? Thinking of you and your children that didn't get to be, and abiding with you in your sadness. So much love to you. And what a beautiful garden to be in while feeling those feels...
ReplyDeleteWhat a lovely way to spend the afternoon with your daughter. I think we all have hidden stories that others would never guess when they looked at us.
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